Should Yahoo!Answers create a “cheating” or “infidelity” catagory?
It seems that the majority of the questions asked, specifically in marriage and divorce are centered somewhere in infidelity. Additionally, these questions get the most responses.
I know it is terrible that there is so much of the infidelity going on, but just an idea – Your thoughts?
I think they should. It would cut down on the same dumb questions asked daily about cheating spouses.
Any one out there have a marriage that survived infidelity?
If so, how did you and your spouse get past the affair?
never happened to me but lots of women i know including my mother and grandmother.
The women in the relationships cried and moaned but forgave their husbands some because they loved them,others because they blamed themselves because they had been too busy with kids/work and ignored husband, and others stay because they can’t afford to leave husband since he pays most of the bills/mortgage.
The women some of them punished their husbands and made him work hard to prove he loved them and was sorry,others bent over backwards to cater for his every whim even sexually (but secretly resenting it) .
But the point is it was never really forgotten as some brought it up in arguments and when they did eventually all divorce this was always seen as the start it.
Also some women say to themselves well if he has done it to me and i forgave him then i can to do it him and he has too forgive me.so it turns into tit for tat literally!
What do you do when you have a cold hearted spouse?
My husband and I have been married a little over a year now and about a month ago he told me that he doesn’t have any emotion left in him. We’ve had problems in our relationship that caused this wall between us (it wasn’t infidelity). I love my husband so much but he’s also told me that he didn’t know if he wanted to continue to work on our marriage or not. He says that he wakes up and goes to sleep with a “whatever happens, happens” type of thinking meaning if I choose to leave him it wouldn’t hurt him. How do I get him to love me more or give more with our marriage? I’ve explained to him that the first year of marriage is the hardest but I just don’t know if to leave it alone or keep pushing for something that isn’t there anymore.
It takes 2 to make the marriage work. If he has that attitute and is unwilling to try…….I think you are doomed.
Do share your survival skills if you had survived a marriage with an ugly past successfully.?
I’m seeking strong ladies out there to share your experience on how you have survived the marriage if your husband had cheated on you and betrayed you with his infidelity. How you had survived emotionally and physically? How you had learn to trust your husband again? How you had pull yourself together? I must say I admire you all for being so strong. I am still struggling to become one of you. Not quite successful yet. I appreciate your willingness to share and am sorry to make you dig out the unhappy past.
Strength is built from within who YOU are as a woman, never let a man dictate your character. You are a strong woman for having to deal with something like infidelity. Most people never get over it, they may forgive, but they will never forget. When you are a victim Of Infidelity in your marriage it makes you feel insecure about yourself and emotionally tears you apart-but you must understand that it is your husband that has the insecurity problem-that is why he cheated in the first place. Do not put blame on yourself for this. cheating happens in a marriage because needs are not being met. For most men, their number one “need” is sexual intimacy, for women “emotional support and communication”. If those needs aren’t met, we cheat to fulfill that need outside the marriage-but that doesn’t mean we dont love our wife/husband. So, if you want to save your marriage you need to seek couseling but you have to understand that your well being comes FIRST, you need to love yourself before you can love anyone else.
If you want to talk more please e-mail me at sicilianqt2004@yahoo.com
he takes money out of the ATM without my knowledge and overdraws the account, he buys me small things and said someone else paid or he got it for free, he spends on things we don’t need. When I confront him he acts like it’s no big deal. He carries the money so I never know what we have to work with because he won’t tell me. I want to carry my own paycheck ,which is direct deposited into a joint account which he takes out, and I’m thinking of getting my own account so he doesn’t mees my credit up much more. I want to save and spend wisely but he makes it difficult. I see an argument in the future if I tell him my plans. Any advice?
I would turn off the TV. Get him to face me, and then say this: “I want to discuss something with you that is INCREDIBLY important to me. I need you to listen to me so that I can let you know how I feel.”
This is NOT normal behavior, and even a guy who can’t catch a hint will recognize that this is really important to you.
Relate exactly what you have written in your question to him and let him know that you value his input and that you value WORKING TOGETHER on your finances.
When my bride and I started working together on our finances – THAT is the moment that we started winning with money!
In fact, I have went on a crusade to help others with their personal finances. You can read my daily blog at http://www.josephsangl.com
